There are few greater rivalries in sport than that between the Black Fish and the tragic detritus of post-modern suburbia that is the DA Boyz. So oppressive was the pre-game tension that the innumerate gaggle of dyskinetic limbs that represented the Boyz could barely bring itself to walk onto the pine until some five minutes of the first half had elapsed. And who could blame them? Five demi-urgic pillars of rippling black-clad masculinity stood at the centre circle, emanating atavistic menace. If it weren't for the Bronx cheers of the capacity crowd, they would surely have scurried from the stadium.
And so it was that the Five Fit Fish - Whittle, Edwards, Noutz, Rodgers and Vasilunas - began their destruction of the hapless Boyz. From the moment the thunderous tap from Rodgers sizzled to the sure hands of a team-mate for a quality fast break, the fate of the Boyz was sealed.
Mere words do no justice to the nature of the merciless annihilation wrought by the Mighty Black Fish. Flawless in every aspect of the game, it was as though the very nature of this beautiful game was wrapped around the DNA of each member of the Fish, a metaphysical connection linking these five fine men and Sport itself. Fortunately words are not required on this occasion. Super-wife Ly captured the essence of the contest on low-quality digital video, a montage of which will be published on this very site within the next few days. Suffice to say, there are a few easy lay-ups on the video.
And what of the five greats who fashioned this mighty victory?
Vasilunas: All spirit, he never stopped running despite having to use a boggy cytokine-ridden mess in place of his ankle.
Rodgers: Was not beaten for a single rebound all night. As always, the rock upon which the Black Fish temple is built.
Noutz: Dynamic, aggressive, possibly a little frightening, he again demonstrated his mastery of the fine line between vigorous basketball and actually killing a couple of little blokes. Again contributed on the scoreboard. Left one or two fingers in the net at the Eastern end.
Edwards: The vital link player in the many end-to-end transition plays that characterised the victory. Continues to tap a rich vein of form at the low post. Avoided any chance of Bronx cheers.
Whittle: Shamelessly helped himself to a lazy 35 points.
And so, at the end of a breathtaking all-court display, the scoreboard declared the Fish winners 61-26.
On a confidence-building three-game streak, the Black Fish now turn their attention to a Round 16 clash with traditional rivals Air Supreme as they focus on consolidating a top-four position, and adding a few more plays to the ever-expanding highlight reel.
Stay tuned as we launch the first of our Warner Wolf-style video packages later this week.